Brrrrrrring brrrrrrrring! The sound of a telephone ringing is a core element in horror films from “Black Christmas” to “Scream.” Now Alexander Graham Bell’s invention is the centerpiece in “The Black Phone,” an adaptation of a Joe Hill short story that Blumhouse has put its summer hype machine behind.
Chip off the old block
If you didn’t know Hill is the son of Stephen King, you might figure it out from the touchstones in this adaptation from director/co-writer Scott Derrickson (“Sinister”). It’s the 1970s and siblings Finney (Mason Thames), an Everyteen, and Gwen (Madeleine McGraw), a Teen With Psychic Ability, fear The Grabber.
The Grabber drives around in a black van and lures kids with balloons – right out of Stranger Danger warnings from your parents (although people were lax about this stuff in the Seventies, granted). The siblings’ parent is pretty scary himself. When drunken Terrence (Jeremy Davies) tries to beat the psychic ability out of Gwen – that was also the “problem” with his late wife – it’s the film’s most disturbing scene.
“Black Phone” (2022)
Director: Scott Derrickson
Writers: Scott Derrickson, C. Robert Cargill (screenplay); Joe Hill (short story)
Stars: Mason Thames, Madeleine McGraw, Ethan Hawke
We’ve been trained to expect scares and perhaps story twists from Blumhouse films, which often tap into our love of classic horror. “Black Phone” captures its time period well, and I love that the brother and sister get along so well. But the plot, themes and scares are remarkably thin, no matter how modest one’s expectations.
Line to the outside? (Spoilers)
(SPOILERS FOLLOW.)
Finney is grabbed and thrown into a basement with only a mattress, a toilet and a few odds and ends. The titular phone doesn’t work, his captor says, but he gets calls from other nabbed kids giving him hints on how to escape with a coil of wire, rolled up carpets, loose tiles, etc.
“Sinister’s” Ethan Hawke is behind the Grabber’s various masks but I’m not sure why. Anyone could’ve played this role. Disappointingly, there’s not much to it. Rather stunningly, the Grabber’s motivations for grabbing and killing kids goes unexplained.
For a while it seems like he might be encouraging his captives to figure out how to get out, like this is an Escape Room game. But nope. When Finney figures it out with help from his ghost pals, the Grabber tries for the first time to kill him.
Thematically, “Black Phone” is Finney’s journey toward standing up against bullies. And I suppose it’s Gwen’s journey toward being OK with her powers. It’s a short journey for both, as they were on those paths pre-Grabber.
In what would be a striking scene in a better film, the dad begs their forgiveness for his mistreatment at the end and they ignore him. They know they can only rely on themselves – and each other – in a world that hasn’t granted them a good parental figure.
Hang up on this one (Spoilers)
It’s a long, rather dull road to get there. In the many basement scenes, Finney tries and fails to get out, but there’s little sense of time pressure, and there isn’t a threat or a mystery around the Grabber. The asides to Gwen are refreshing only inasmuch as the basement is a dull setting.
An aside to the Grabber’s brother (James Ransone) is a blown opportunity for … something. Dark comedy? He’s researching the kidnappings and doesn’t realize they are going on right under his nose. But the maps and photos on his crime wall are vague. We get no sense of how close he is to figuring it out, or why he can’t.
I might be sour on Derrickson’s film because it’s so minimalist compared to “Summer of 84” (2018) and “Cruel Summer” Season 1 (2021). Those projects involve teen kidnappings in decades past but have significantly more story and emotional heft.
Brrrrrring, brrrrrrring? In “Black Phone,” it’s more like borrrrrrrrrrrring.